Since I am a person who had been born and brought up from the Southern part of Tamilnadu in India, it is a place where exists a variety of ethnic customs and traditions accompanied by a conservative kinda people. Though you would have gone through my previous blog posts which pictures most of the beautiful and positive aspects of my place, this time I'm sharing a little bitter truth and information about the people (not the place), which, according to me, is one of the most negative matter I always ponder my mind with. And the thing tat I'm gonna deal with, today is...............of course.........nothing other than the dowry system prevailing here in my place to a very greater extent.
Before going in-depth into my topic, lemme just present an illustration to give a start to it. Just have a look at the two pictures shown below.
Yes, this is the real portrayal of millions and millions of married girls in India who are going through the rash effects of dowry system. With reference to the two pictures above, when we look at the first picture, its damn cool in the sense that it shows the real 'inside' of the woman....how she feels.......how she enjoys her dreams about her new life. Her whole face is lighted up with extreme happiness and excitement, mainly regarding her soul-mate who's gonna be with her forever. But, on the contrary, when we look at the second one, why??? what happened? where has that blushing face gone? why is the girl's face filled wih 'questions marks' all over her face regarding her life? why??? why???? So many questions can be arised...........The answer?.................The one and only answer is, complete shattering of her dreams. To be more concise, none of her expectations were met in her husband's house. Instead, from the very first day itself, complete package of tortures and torments which were unbearable and shocking that it erased all the happiness in her face into sorrow. The reason behind this??? Dowry............Yes....this is not just a fake or imaginative condition. But, this is really the true harassment that's going on in many ladies' life because of the greediness and cruelty of the bridegroom's family.
I wonder why the people's mentality is like this! Why are girls thought as something which is sold to the bridegroom's family? Isn't she a human being? Doesn't she have any feelings or emotions? Does money and assests and all other materialistic things play an important role in this world than the marriage life which is considered to be so pure? Why is this so? What is this custom? What does property, jewels and money need to make with an entirely different concept of starting a new family life? Are girls that much degradable, cheap and inferior to men? I have many more questions running in my mind...................Feel so pity for ample number of newly married girls who were tormented and chased by their husband and in-laws to get more from their home, as a result of which the daily newspapers get numerous incidents as news where poor, innocent girls commit suicide. Apart from that, the other side is, many of them being murdered for the sake of dowry too.
Here in our district, I've come across, seen and heard about the extreme difficulties that girls face each and everyday because of this dowry harassment. The worst part of this matter is, a woman being an enemy to another woman...the mother-in-laws who make their daughter-in-laws die. But why is this and wats the solution for this? The current situation is , in my opinion, dowry is something which decides the fate of a girl's marriage life. When raking my mind regarding the solution for this, really I can't get a practical answer for this..............The only feeling that I got in my heart was that, when each and every individual take a decision to be against dowry, then that's the time when there will be atleast a tiny start for resolving this problem. But, I am longing for such a period to come in my place when the people become more broad-minded leaving their traditional and conservative thinking. Unless the people come to the ground of humanity, whatever laws or acts our constitution provide would be of no use....I feel!
My only desire is that the girls who get married should find their husband's family and house as a Heaven and not as a Hell. But will this current plight of girls change? Will have to wait and see.......
And thats the time I'll feel really happy because really I feel so much bad about this matter......... Always respect a woman and her feelings..............
Before going in-depth into my topic, lemme just present an illustration to give a start to it. Just have a look at the two pictures shown below.
Indian bride on her wedding day (before getting married) |
A married girl who's tormented for the one and only cause - "Dowry" |
Yes, this is the real portrayal of millions and millions of married girls in India who are going through the rash effects of dowry system. With reference to the two pictures above, when we look at the first picture, its damn cool in the sense that it shows the real 'inside' of the woman....how she feels.......how she enjoys her dreams about her new life. Her whole face is lighted up with extreme happiness and excitement, mainly regarding her soul-mate who's gonna be with her forever. But, on the contrary, when we look at the second one, why??? what happened? where has that blushing face gone? why is the girl's face filled wih 'questions marks' all over her face regarding her life? why??? why???? So many questions can be arised...........The answer?.................The one and only answer is, complete shattering of her dreams. To be more concise, none of her expectations were met in her husband's house. Instead, from the very first day itself, complete package of tortures and torments which were unbearable and shocking that it erased all the happiness in her face into sorrow. The reason behind this??? Dowry............Yes....this is not just a fake or imaginative condition. But, this is really the true harassment that's going on in many ladies' life because of the greediness and cruelty of the bridegroom's family.
I wonder why the people's mentality is like this! Why are girls thought as something which is sold to the bridegroom's family? Isn't she a human being? Doesn't she have any feelings or emotions? Does money and assests and all other materialistic things play an important role in this world than the marriage life which is considered to be so pure? Why is this so? What is this custom? What does property, jewels and money need to make with an entirely different concept of starting a new family life? Are girls that much degradable, cheap and inferior to men? I have many more questions running in my mind...................Feel so pity for ample number of newly married girls who were tormented and chased by their husband and in-laws to get more from their home, as a result of which the daily newspapers get numerous incidents as news where poor, innocent girls commit suicide. Apart from that, the other side is, many of them being murdered for the sake of dowry too.
Here in our district, I've come across, seen and heard about the extreme difficulties that girls face each and everyday because of this dowry harassment. The worst part of this matter is, a woman being an enemy to another woman...the mother-in-laws who make their daughter-in-laws die. But why is this and wats the solution for this? The current situation is , in my opinion, dowry is something which decides the fate of a girl's marriage life. When raking my mind regarding the solution for this, really I can't get a practical answer for this..............The only feeling that I got in my heart was that, when each and every individual take a decision to be against dowry, then that's the time when there will be atleast a tiny start for resolving this problem. But, I am longing for such a period to come in my place when the people become more broad-minded leaving their traditional and conservative thinking. Unless the people come to the ground of humanity, whatever laws or acts our constitution provide would be of no use....I feel!
My only desire is that the girls who get married should find their husband's family and house as a Heaven and not as a Hell. But will this current plight of girls change? Will have to wait and see.......
And thats the time I'll feel really happy because really I feel so much bad about this matter......... Always respect a woman and her feelings..............
We must remember that unless and until women are given their rightful place,
no society or country can progress.
--Prime Minister IK Gujral
On Occasion of India 50